Hard Days

Some days are hard and let’s be honest with each other, when you’re right in the throes of a string of hard days it just kinda sucks. We can always try to see the positives and the silver linings, but usually someone suggesting this when we’re down there in the trenches stirs up anger and resentment rather than positive, helpful mindset shifts. Once we have dragged ourselves through these hard days though, it is much easier to see the growth and benefits that we gained over our time in the trenches. And I think it might just help us weather the storm better the next time we find ourselves out in one. Last year I heard a song by Brantley Gilbert called (you guessed it)..”hard days” that instantly made me pause and check my perspective on the hard days I’ve been through. Take a look at a snippet of the lyrics, or better yet listen carefully to the whole song and see what comes up for you!

You would've never learned the words to "Amazing Grace"

Never felt the chill of a pew when you lost faith

Well, blood, sweat, and tears wouldn't mean a thing

If you didn't strike out a couple hundred times

If you never hit rock bottom, never cursed the sky

You would've never known to ask the good Lord why

Or ever changed your life

If you never had hard days

If you never had a heartbreak

Never had more than you can take

Or carried the weight

Of life on your shoulders

Would you feel like you earned it?

Would you live with a purpose?

Or ever known your own strength

If you never had hard days?

You wouldn't know what it's like to dance in the rain

Never see the silver lining when the skies go grey

You wouldn't know a dream come true from a few that don't

You'd never find your way on a broken road 

While I find almost all the lyrics relatable and resonating on some level, I was most stuck by the chorus (in bold). Without our hard days, do you think you would feel like you earned the good stuff? Do you think you’d search for a purpose? Would you even bother to be motivated to change your life? Certainly you would never have had the opportunity to know your own strength. 

We often base our current interpretations, feelings, and level of appreciation by making comparisons to our past experiences - many times our brain is busy doing this in the background and we might not even realize it! Sure, having everything come easily and smoothly sounds nice on the surface, but I think when it comes down to it, we’d all agree that not having the opportunity to learn our own strength would actually be devastating. It doesn’t mean it would be fun and it doesn’t mean we’d get to dictate what our hard days would be or what challenges would come our way. But even without knowing for sure what would happen, I truly hope that when we really thought about it, we would all choose not to be robbed of learning how amazing and strong we really are. We would all opt for the opportunity - even if it meant needing to accept the rough patches, adversities and challenges to get there. 

 So next time you find yourself in a stretch of hard days, even if you can’t see the positives and the learning opportunities while you’re in there, that’s ok. One day you will, you’ll get there. For now, think about how much better the good days are going to seem in comparison, think about how much stronger you’re becoming, and how we aren’t shaped by the easy things that happen to us, we are who we are because of our hard days and challenges, not in spite of them. I don’t know about you, but my friends, I have never met a strong person I’ve admired who had an easy past. They might not talk about it, but you can always tell. So although they are terrible and difficult and sometimes seem like they can’t end soon enough, don’t just rush through your hard days wishing they never happened. Be patient and kind to yourself and take heart in knowing, you are truly gaining so much from being there and one day you’ll be able to look back and see it. Better days are coming and you’ll appreciate them so much more!